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Teh Suck

Tonight I came home to find 100+ signature pages I have to sign for the hardcover edition of Subterranean #6 - pages that I have to get back in the mail by this Friday. I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to have to do this tonight - honestly, I couldn't be happier. Because, after a couple of weeks of being depressed about a number of projects that have fizzled out or imploded, two impending rejections looming over my head, and dealing with some fucking bullshit over money due to me (that I will in all likelihood never see), I just don't feel like writing. I'm not in the mood to open up some crappy story file and stare at 100 words for three hours. Spending an evening signing pages until my hand cramps will make me feel like I'm doing something constructive, something "writerly". After two weeks of wannabe-ism, I can at least pretend for three hours tonight that there's at least a goddamn sliver of worth to what I try to do.

Don't ask me about tomorrow, though. :/

Marine Autumn

I owe you marine autumn
With dankness at its roots
and fog like a grape
and the graceful sun of the country;
and the silent space
in which sorrows lose themselves
and only the bright crown
of joy comes to the surface.

--Pablo Neruda.

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